Saturday, January 30, 2010

I'm the Weiner!

So I'm still reading this book Searching for God Knows What and it keeps making me think about the way I am living my life and the way I want to live. I feel so conflicted about a few things.

This semester I am in a Contemporary Social Issues class and we talk about both the conservative view and the liberal view and I see flaws in both. But at the same time they both have their ways of making sense. Conservatives, or republicans, make decisions based on the people's ability to take care of themselves and government is just there to be preset organization in a way. Liberals, or democrats, are all about everyone being equal so everyone has the same amount of suffering or success as another.

I can tell you right now that in classes I've been in people react much better to taking ownership of what they're doing for themselves and simply being supervised, and that by making everyone the same it completely eliminates the ability for competition. But that right there has stopped me. In my book the author says that the need to be competitive is to prove to a jury of your peers that you are more worthy than another. Where does this need come from?

Don makes a very understandable point, that because of the fall, man's separation from God, the one who fulfilled all our emotional needs, we now look to others for worth. We compete everyday to prove our worth in order to stay in the "life boat." We determine who is the least worthy and the first to be thrown out of the boat, and that we compete with one another to secure our spot.

Sadly I can understand this. I am a very competitive person. I like playing games I might not always be good at them but its mainly a fun thing to do. But I also relate to the other side of this very well too. I need people to like me, approve of me, make me feel like I belong there. I've understood that the two could be connected but its made me take a step back and try to see if they connect a majority of the time for me.

(Haha and the title is sort of an inside joke. But it sounds like I'm the winner.)

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